March 22

March 22
I was Charlie 1 again last night, but unlike last week where I could have slept walked the entire night, I was kept more or less busy. 

I was supposed to go 482 at 0200, but we’re so shorthanded we went without a Charlie 4, so I picked up the east pit drop with Spike at 0230. 

Spike has – and this isn’t even subject for discussion – the foulest mouth I have ever heard. I spent four years on a submarine where I earned a Ph.D. in the F word with an emphasis on the Holy Trinity and even I was appalled. 

Spike was yapping about pigs and twigs and how a bachelor like me should never turn down a phone number from a fat pig because pigs generally have thin friends and she was talking about (human) genitalia in ways that made even me uncomfortable.

Despite this, we managed to conduct a flawless east pit drop and then I went 482. I was actually in the EDR when Schempp called and asked if I would help Spike do mass markers. 

Now some people – like Schempp, for instance – would’ve pointed out they were already in the EDR ready to start 482, but I haven’t been named MCSD graveyard Employee of the Month twice for my looks so I said sure and scurried to the cage and showed Spike how to collect the markers from the pits and bring them back to the cage and then I go to the office and get a new radio because mine was a piece of crap and then they needed somebody to bring the employee bank from the basement to the cage which ruled because I ended up escorting the pretty and funny Princess Emma and then I had to go and get another radio cause my second one turned out to be complete manure and I finally started 482 at 0340, a full hour and forty minutes after I had been originally scheduled. 

The EDR is still being remodeled and the buffet line is in the hall and it was slightly better tonight, meaning it was barely fit for human consumption as opposed to last night when it resembled a sewer. Everything had been out for hours and there wasn’t much left.

After 482 Code Four Carlin wanted me to meet him in the casino security office, but Ted was begging for an officer to escort the dealers and their tokes from the toke room where they’re sorted and counted, to the cage so I did that and when I finally got to the casino security office Code Four Carlin wanted some help with a report he was writing. Code Four Carlin thinks he’s illiterate and that I’m Shakespeare and he wanted me to look his report over. It was a pretty good report, but I made some minor, meaningless suggestions so he could reaffirm his low opinion of himself before heading to Eddie – 2. Matters slowed down from there and I roved and manned the podium for the last hour. 

Here is your Henry lineup for tonight:

Henry 1 – moi
Henry 2 – Lee
Henry 3 – X-Ray

Recall that I missed two nights in the hotel last week because I was in dispatch, so it will be great to be back with the International Henry Units again.

March 16 & 19
March 23 & 24
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