Good God, it was slow last night. Not historically slow, I did have three calls, but otherwise I spent all night walking from one sitting post to another. I would sit for 15 minutes in a maid’s room, hit the scan button there, sit for another 15 minutes then walk two floors before arriving at the next maid’s room with a chair and a desk.
And, as a show of solidarity, I’ve taken to taking Lee’s 10-10’s with him.
I am blaming this entirely on Lee. He is such a professional that when I announce my 10-10 is over within a few seconds he is opening the door to the EDR, ready to start his and I can see no reason to leave Lee sitting there all by himself so I’ll stay and keep him company.
The only thing preventing all three International Henry Units from being in the EDR for the entire shift is that X-Ray typically takes his 10-10’s in the hotel.
Here was your Henry lineup for last night:
Henry 1 – moi
Henry 2 – Lee
Henry 3 – X-Ray
I was determined to liven things up a bit tonight; I did not want a repeat of last night where I walked from one chair to another. Now, make no mistake about it, I am still committed to a strong Foot on the Desk percentage – though I am now too lazy to compute it – but I’m not a slug, for Pete’s sake.
I started off strong, too, getting a full round in in just over an hour. By then Lee and X-Ray were in the hotel and Lee and I get a call and then we head to the hotel security office on 16 to scope out the new med bags.
Monte Carlo really splurged on these. They’re the same kind the EMT’s carry and they’re fully loaded, including oxygen and portable defibrillator. They are first-class pieces of gear.
They also weigh a ton. I’m pretty strong and I found it heavy, but they come with backpack straps, which makes it a lot easier, though if OMP ever has to carry it he may well stop en route and use the oxygen on himself.
History reared its head last night as, for the first time, a guest asked me if I wanted to have sex with her!
I am not making that up! It happened right after 482 when I was sent to a room on 32 to assist a guest in opening her safe. Unfortunately, it’s not one of the new ones I can open with the thingy we have for that purpose, so Engineering was called up to open it and I am left standing there right next to the bed with a pretty foxy blonde about my age.
She is there with her husband, who, according to testimony from her, has spent the past four days blowing 40 grand and ignoring her. She is lonely and just drunk enough to flirt with me. She asks if I am married and gratuitously grabs my biceps, which are not without merit, and generally looks for any excuse to have contact with me. This is not completely unprecedented; she is not the first tipsy, lonely woman to feel me up in the hotel. She is the first one to ask if I wanted to have sex with her though.
Though it’s really good for morale for a foxy babe to ask if you want to have sex with her, in reality, this isn’t code four. One, you do not take advantage of guests like that. It is a violation of not only Monte Carlo policy, but, most importantly, International Henry Unit bylaws and whatever’s left of my own personal moral code. I am certainly not above taking advantage of a tipsy, lonely woman, but we really don’t need to be doing that at work.
Two, should I do it, all she has to do is pick up the phone and say one of your officers just raped me, and campers that is it, point, set and match, life as I know it is over.
Eventually, Bruce shows up with the key. He can’t find the keyhole, though, which even I know is behind the nameplate on the front. He doesn’t believe me when I tell him this, requiring verification from Engineering dispatch before he tries it and – surprise! – opens the safe. About this time the husband shows up and Bruce is running into problems getting the safe to work. He insists on closing the door when entering the security code when the instructions say to leave it open. Plus, I don’t think he’s pressing the ‘C’ key like he’s supposed to and eventually, he wanders off so I step into the closet where the safe is and follow instructions and get it to work perfectly. The woman takes one last opportunity to cop a feel by demanding a tutorial and getting real close to me.
Her husband needs to take care of business.
I was treated to two hours with Spike, from 0400-0600 for some hotel training. I give her the whole tour, from the executive offices on the second floor to a penthouse on 32 and I even take her on the roof.
Even though Spike admits to having a wife, it was proven she was a woman when we’re sitting in a maid’s room prior to 10-10. She said she had to go to the bathroom and, typical of a woman, she spent a full ten minutes in there.
Here is your Dispatch lineup for tonight:
David 1 – moi
David 2 – JK, Boy Dispatcher