April 26 & 27

April 26
Here was your Henry (hotel) lineup for last night:  

Henry 1 – OMP
Henry 2 – moi
Henry 3 – X-Ray

I am still not sure why I wasn’t in the casino, as is usual for Tuesday, but I’ll take it. 

Check out the shocker for tonight:

Henry 1 – X-Ray
Henry 2 – Lee
Henry 3 – Dougie Fresh

Dougie Fresh is the nickname settled on for Doug. I think Junior coined it.

Here is your outside lineup for tonight. Mary refers to mobile units in a vehicle, Baker to units on a bicycle:

Mary 1 – Judy
Mary 2 – moi
Baker 1 – Redneck Randy
Baker 2 – Schempp

There has been a rash of car thefts along the Strip and Monte Carlo has not been immune, so we are stepping up outside patrols. My new summer outside uniform will make its debut tonight, BDU shorts and a short-sleeved polo shirt. The Comfort Flex Stingrays are inappropriate with shorts, so I will wear my basketball ref’s shoes, which will do fine. 

X-Ray, of course, can handle Henry 1. He’s done it before and this versatility is just another example of why he is going straight to the top in the hotel racket. Dougie Fresh, apparently, worked the hotel at the Mirage. We’re not impressed with that, of course, but it probably means he can be counted on to not completely muck matters up. Dougie Fresh has rather matronly hips and thighs. 

Last night X-Ray and I moved on a poignant, tragic call, the type that really hits home. It started with him radioing me.

– Henry 3, Henry 2, let me get you down here on the fourth-floor elevator-core.
– 10-4, sir. 

I get there and X-Ray is standing near the door to one of the suites guarding two bottles of champagne and some sort of vodka drink, all unopened. 

Well, there is really only one thing you can do in this situation because you can’t leave unattended booze in the hall because what if a kid picks it up? You can’t leave them sitting in the maid’s room, you can’t take them home and you certainly can’t drink them. There is nothing to do but get rid of them. 

X-Ray and I take them to the maid’s room. I have the foresight to open my champagne bottle over the bathroom sink, somewhat mitigating the damage, but X-Ray opens his out in the open and has a mess to clean up. 

The champagne wasn’t Dom, but it wasn’t yak piss either, and X-Ray and I are classy guys and we hated to waste it. Besides, champagne is a lot like meatloaf, even the lower end stuff has merit. 

April 27
Here was your Outside lineup for last night:

Mary 1 – Judy
Mary 2 – moi
Baker 1 – Redneck Randy
Baker 2 – Schempp

Outside unit commitment to stopping the rash of auto break-ins on the Strip, or at least at Monte Carlo, is total, and there were times tonight when there were three, and sometimes four, of us in the garage. This led to three of us responding fairly quickly when we got a report of a guy whizzing on the bridge between the garage and the hotel. Judy and I were BSing on five when the case broke and we sped off, but Redneck Randy got there so fast we joked he could’ve helped the guy zip his pants back up. 

There was one big call in the hotel, which I ended up responding to. 

X-Ray and Code Four Carlin were sent to 28 because someone reported hearing a woman screaming. They get there and hear nothing but, X-Ray being X-Ray, he decides to snoop around a little bit and they come across a woman screaming on 29. She is so loud you can hear her in the background when X-Ray reports it in, and that’s with the door to the room closed. 

I’m BSing with FTO Terry, who’s OT at Eddie – 1, when this goes down. I drop everything, get to the truck, which I left running – called ‘running hot’ in the trade – squealed out of the lot, zipped across South Drive to the valet entrance and parked illegally in front of the Casino Royale doors and ran to the elevator. 

Bi-Bob and I get to the elevator at the same time and we get up there and Redneck Randy is already there, having popped up from the EDR, as is Dougie Fresh and some casino units, including Rich. 

The woman was screaming, not because she got beaten, which it sounded like, but because she was crackers. 

I was beaming as X-Ray – in his role as Henry 1 no less! – took command. He showed the right amount of concern for the guest, but also, in his low-key, understated way, told the husband his wife more or less had to shut it down because we can’t have the other guests being bothered like this. 

Schempp is an old woman. We were in the bike cage in the garage and Schempp takes inventory of the new bikes MCSD just purchased and compares it with the bike officer roster and reviews which officers were issued new bikes and who was left with an old bike (basically only Schempp) and announced he should’ve been issued a new bike. Good gravy. I was inspecting Mary 2 and filling out some attendant paperwork and was obliged to listen to this as Schempp wasted a full three minutes of brainpower on this. 

Look, officially I like Schempp. Usually, he’s pretty funny, but sometimes he whines like a four-year-old. 

Here is your Henry lineup for tonight:

Henry 1 – moi
Henry 2 – Lee
Henry 3 – X-Ray 

With the schedule in complete chaos for the time being, we don’t know when the International Henry Units will be together again. Lee is working the brewpub on Wednesdays now, so our consecutive nights in the hotel may well be over.

April 22
April 29
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