October 14

October 14
Here was your Henry lineup for last night:

Henry 1 – moi
Henry 2 – White Sox Metzger
Henry 3 – X-Ray

I am not entirely sure why Lee wasn’t up there tonight, and I know you’re puzzled by it, too. Metzger usually only works the hotel on Sundays, a night I have off, but my job is only to salute and say ‘Yes, sir’.

Metzger is a good officer, but for whatever reason is not looked upon with any kind of favor by 88TonyB or 77Rick. He volunteered to be a report writer for the shift and was turned down. He applied to become a certified first aid/CPR instructor and he wasn’t selected for that, either.

Yours truly, meanwhile, had his CPR instructor application granted, and, I was made a report writer even though I had expressed no interest in the position.

It could be because Metzger wears white socks with his uniform.

Metzger also rides his bike to work, because his car is unregistered and he couldn’t renew his registration because he lacked insurance. Then he bought a scooter and rode that to work for a while, but then that broke down. Now he is biking it rather than risk getting pulled over and getting in real trouble.

It was so slow last night I really had to slow up my rounds. I like to get three rounds on my floors over the course of a night, but it was so slow I was in danger of getting way more than that in.

When Henry 1, I like to get the first round between 2200 and midnight, when I go on my first 10-10. With Henry 1 responsible for floors 23-32, that makes for a very leisurely tour and it helps to have a couple-three calls during that time.

Actually, I only do floors 23-31 during that first tour. After 10-10 ends at 0010, I have 50 minutes to kill before I go 482 and usually head up to 32 and do tower checks. But even with three wings it doesn’t take all that long and if there are no calls to attend to during that time you find yourself spending a lot of time sitting in the 32 maid’s room, which comes equipped with a nice chair and a desk for the supervisor.

After 482 you spend the rest of the night getting your final two rounds in. Even on moderately busy nights, this is not all that difficult to do, even while maintaining a proper Foot on the Desk percentage.

And nobody has said anything about this policy; hell, I was awarded a comp to the coffee shop for implementing it, so obviously nobody’s getting too worked up over it.

But it was so slow that I could tell very early on that I would have to step up my Foot on the Desk efforts, specifically by finding more places to sit and kill time besides maid’s rooms, because not every maid’s room has a chair and a desk, only those on 32, 30 and every three floors thereafter.

To steal a line from a Gore Vidal novel, my quest was neither arduous nor unrewarded. Actually, I knew of these places anyway but had never considered them as possible Foot on the Desk sites until tonight. For example, the room right next to the bellman’s elevator foyer on every floor is used for storage, except on 13 and 17 where they’re offices for the carpet guys and painters. Also, what would ordinarily be the 336 rooms on floors 24 through 31 are used for storage as well, with the room in 29 having two sweet chairs to sit in that also offer a great view of the west.

The only downside was I didn’t bother to calculate the Foot on the Desk percentage! I have no idea why not and hereby issue apologies. It would’ve been pretty impressive.

Here is your Mary lineup for tonight. Take note, because it’s a doozie:

Mary 1 – moi
Mary 2 – D-Dawg

I am not making that up! I debut as Mary 1 while D-Dawg has my back in the two-hole.

This is too profound for words. G-man and D-Dawg, famous for their Saturday night hotel patrols, are being unleashed on the Monte Carlo perimeter.

God bless all of you.

October 13
October 18
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